Wake Up Call

I’m not sure when, as a parent or daughter or wife, you suddenly acquire this fear of “the dreaded phone call” but I always remember my parents saying that whenever the phone rings in the middle of the night or any ungodly hour of the night, there is a strange and fearful dread as you pick up the phone, even more so if someone you love is not at home. 

 

My sister and I have this crazy ritual that drives our spouses insane.  We call each other almost every single morning.  And then as the day progresses, we call each other throughout the day as new information breaks or as we remember something that we forgot to tell each other that morning.  And then again, we call each other in the evening before bed to recap and repeat the days’ events. 

 

One morning, the phone rings.  Big surprise!  It is my sister. 

 

She starts speaking in a hushed tone, “The surgeon from the hospital called me late last night to say they’re rushing [her husband] into an emergency surgery.  He said to get to the hospital in 20 minutes, say your good-byes because it looks like he’s not going to make it through the surgery. ”

 

My heart suddenly feels tight and I feel like I can’t breathe.  And everything she hasn’t said to me over the phone explodes through my brain: 

 

He’s passed away and my sister didn’t want to call me in the middle of the night to alarm me.

 

She went to watch him die without me there to hold her hand.

 

She didn’t give me a chance to say good bye to him.

 

Her voice interrupts me as I start to feel my eyes burn and she tells me that he made it through the surgery, but he is still not stable and at any moment his condition could turn.  This was the beginning of a 2+ years journey of hospital stays and hospital visits; infections, wounds and scars; sedation and unconsciousness; breathing assisted, breathing unassisted; tears and anger and relief. 

 

That dreaded phone call became the wake up call for me.  Tell those that are precious in our lives how much they are valued and loved.  Take care of those you love, including yourself, for those loved ones depend on you.  Find joy in the moments you share with them.